getting old

years ago when we first got married and bought our home some of jasons friends thought of it as his bachlor pad instead of our home together. they were over every single day, until all hours of the night and half the time they stayed all night. i didnt feel like it was my home at first because of this, i didnt fully fee comfortable there, and def couldnt go about whatever i wanted to do because someone was always there somewhat in the way. i believe our relationship suffered some because of this and one day when i couldnt take it absolutely no more i told jason he was gonna have to do something about it...and he did and finally when there wasnt always someone there things were much much better for me in my home and for us as a couple...the year we got married actually the month we got married jasons dad decided to build a garage, a big garage one that jason had always wanted where he could do all the car audio work he needed to, filled with tools and supplies and jason dream come true. and then jason was no longer at home with me anymore, he worked the weekend shift at the dollar general warehouse which was friday saturday and sunday and mon through thursday he was at the garage all day long sometimes passed dinner time, there were many weeks that i brely saw him at all and yet again i struggled with it, he never really understood because it was something he was doing so a little side money and of course something that he completely loved to sometimes making me feel like he would rather do that any time than be with me and then me and the kids once they came along. well that particular shop is out of the story now but we have just recently moved to a new house and now he has yet again a garage, a muhc smaller one but still a garage and day and day out there is someone here getting there car worked on, or people hanging around while jason works on his and it may be that i have just been sick for a few days and have not really been in the mood to have other people at my hosue whether they are inside or outside or what but as each day passes and someone is always here and jason is always outside working on someones stuff or in the garage and i sit back and think that he doesnt help me with anything of our own that needs to be done i am getting more and more frustrated. i really dont know how much more i am going to be able to take cause i am very quickly beginning to feel uncomfortable in my own house yet again. cant do what i wanna do when i wanna do it and feeling like i always have to entertain someone. i mention it to him and he doesnt seem to care, and its not that i want him to give up the one thing that he loves (working on cars audio stuff) ut damn does it have to be every single day from the time he wakes up until the time he goes to work and then im in the bed before he gets back home. im just frustrated right now and wondering what i should do about it all.

love revived

dont get me wrong jason and i love each other with all our hearts, it has never faded throughout these 13 years we have been together but with our extremely busy lives these day with the kids the house both of us working and me in school we havent been able to spend hardly any time together alone, SO...... we decided to take a little 4 night 5 day vacation away from all that life has given us to take time just for us and our relationship, and boy did we need it. so off we went. we headed to the mountains, we had a beautiful cabin with a hot tub that we thoroughly enjoyed on those cooler evenings, we did alot of shopping, and eating, talking and having a great time. we took a horse carriage ride one night and took the skylift to the top of the mountain on another night and both were so romantic. we were able to relax soak it all in and just enjoy each other without all the daily stress we are used to. it was soooo nice, and even though we both missed the kids terribly we hated to see it all end at the end of the week. it had been 5 years sice we had taken a vacation but it had been nearly 8 years since we had taken a vacation just the two of us and it was long over due and we both vowed that we would never let it be that long before we took one ever again.
now we are very excited about hopefully being able to take another trip to the same area come fall with the kids so that they can enjoy it as well, there were so many things there that i know the kids would love so a trip in the fall is the plan.
this trip also helped me clear y head a bit of all the crap i had been having to deal with from people i would rather not be associated with. and that was a big thing i was hoping would be taken care of.
we wouldnt have been able to do anything if it werent for jason and my mothers and sisters volunteering to take wonderful care of our kids while we were gone and since we had never been away from them that long we were afraid it would be a difficult task but it wasnt, they did really well and had alot of fun with the family as well, so it was a win win.

snapfest

          We have been in our new house for like a little over 3 months now and we havent done a damn thing to any one of the neighbors near us to make them hate us and yet they are really pushing my damn buttons. we have two dogs, two small dogs that are HOUSE dogs that only go outside for very small periods of time to use the bathroom and might i add that we have a fenced in back yard, so there are always on our property. So this is a new place still for them and they are freakin dogs so yeah they bark sometimes but i have never just left them outside barking their damn heads off for hours at a time, yet a bitch neighbor of ours, who is like in her 60's felt it necessary to come to my house last thursday evening, rag my door bell, ran got in her car, cursed me like a damn dog when i opened the door, and without giving me a chance to rspond she drove off back to her house that is on the next road over. i was furious. i thought i was gonna have a freakin stroke i was so damn mad. so instead ofletting ugly tabatha comeout like i really wanted to and go to her house and handle my business i called for a police officer to come over so maybe they could relay my message to her that, that would NEVER ever happen again or i would whip her old ass all over my yard or hers which ever i had to do. so they went and talked to her and that was that. until tonight when while i had company i hear my doorbell ring once again and there stands yet another police officer saying there had been a complaint called in about my dogs barking. i informed him that my dogs have been in the house all day and the last time they had even went outside to use the bathroom was like 2 hours ago, he laughed and said no problem, me on the other hand, my blood was boiling. it is taking everything i have in me not to walk my fat ass over to her house right now. i know the bitch didnt hear my dogs barking for inside my house when she lives on the next street over. plus they are fucking dogs bitch, they will bark sometimes but they are always either in my house or in my yard, get the fuck over it. but im not gonna keep playig these little games with this old ass woman before i put an end to it for real and its not gonna be pretty at all, i can promise you that.
           An not only have i been ealing with stupid neighbors but i have been dealing with trouble making family members as well lately. the same ones i always have trouble with because if they dont have enough drama going on they find some one to make more trouble with and this time i was just not willing to let them do their thing, with threatening, running their mouths and making up lies with out responding back to their trashy skanky ways, and they didnt like what i had to say but it was all straight truth. i have said what i wanted to say to them and i am ready to handle it any other way i need to if it comes to that because i am at a point in my life where im really not willing to put of with people fucking shit anymore and i will stop it any way i have to. i can cut you down with my tongue but dont think i wont beat a bitches ass if i have to cause i will and right now im not really worried about it at all. so with all that said my little vacation alone with jason away from all the bullshit cant come fast enough and thankfully its only a couple days away cause i dont know how much more i can take before i have a snapfest on each and every person that has pissed me off.
          So if i dont come back home completely refreshed my little vacation alot of shit is about to go down cause i am beyond sick and tired of everyones bullshit.